Have you ever had those days when the only thing working in your house is YOU?  My home computer is on the fritz....the disposal won't dispose....the bathroom heater over heats.....and somewhere in the midst of the caos I have misplaced my mind.  

To top it off I spent the entire day with my "older" brother trying to probate our mother's will.  There are a few snags due to our other brother's involuntary committment.  But that wasn't the most frustrating part of my day....it was the fact that my brother Butch loses everything that he comes in contact with.  He lost a piece of paper walking from the tag agency to the car. (approximately 5 feet)  I don't know how he does it but he is the most scatter brained ex-cop I have ever encountered.

There has been no change in Mike's condition. It seems that his lucid moments were just that....moments.....few & apparently far between. Ron &  I have seen him every day but he's been "way out there" every time.  He likes to test our truthfulness by telling us to "blink once with your right eye".  I think that is some kind of lie dectection method he is using.  He has no idea what day of the week it is and when we tell him he doesn't believe us.  That's when he gets into the whole blink with your left eye business.  I played along for awhile and then I just told him "No".  I wasn't sure how he'd react but he just looked at me and moved on to something else just as bizarre!  

He told us he is going to carry a boat to Alaska and he's going to go moose hunting and when he kills a moose he is going to drink its blood.  He is fixated on some kind of ritual he has heard about or something.  Religion is another key component right now and we are all asked to pray several times during our visits.  He continually repeats, "Blood of Christ"  "I am the Good Shepherd"  "I am protecting my flock".  

When we went to see him Saturday evening we were told he was at a dance!  The security guard asked us if Mike is married and after I said no he said "Well, he may be before he leaves here."  It seems he has been quite the amorous gentleman during his stay.  

I am usually so depressed after visiting I can't sleep.  I just don't know what is going to happen.  I have learned that at some point he will be released to us and it is up to his family to take care of him.  I know he can't live alone and my older brother says his wife is afraid of Mike so he can't live with them.  He asked me if I would do it since I'm alone anyway.  Well, I guess I've been tagged, "Your it".  
I'm not complaining really for he has been my responsibility for the past 18 years.  I'm just feeling overwhelmed at the moment.  Ron is upset about the situation but as I said to him, "What am I supposed to do?"  I won't turn my back on him.  But......he hasn't been released yet.  He has a ways to go but I also know that the way the system works....we will get no advanced notice either.

Enough of my whining!    I've got work to do.