Thursday, March 17, 2011

My Irish Blessing

Happy St. Patrick's Day to ya!  I was greeted this morning by the world's tallest leprechaun, 6'2" to be exact.  Ron loves holidays.  It doesn't matter what holiday he loves them all.  He sends cards to all his family and friends for every holiday including Ground Hog's Day.  He's just cute that way.  Well, this morning he had made green eggs and had purchased St. Patrick's buttons for everyone he works with and one for me.  Mine says, "World's Cutest Leprechaun", don't you know:)  I also have a green beaded necklace and bracelet to wear. He's so funny!  He's like a little kid when there is fun to be had.  

Most of the time I don't even think about his cancer.  I'm just determined to enjoy our time together...this moment...and think of nothing else.  But, it is times like this morning when he's having so much fun and is so happy that it will slip into my head.  When he hugs me and holds me a second longer than usual, the tears start to well up in my eyes.  It's then that it will hit me.  I start trying to memorize the moment so I won't forget what it feels like to be in his arms.  I feel a pain so deep in my heart I'm not sure I can breathe.

I told myself for years that I never wanted to love anyone again.  I never wanted to feel the pain of loss again.  So I protected my heart and spent more than 30 years alone.  But, now I realize that it is worth the risk to love someone and to know the feeling of being loved in return even for one day!  There will be plenty of time to grieve when the time comes but for now we'll just eat green scrambled eggs and wear silly Irish pins.

May those who love us, love us
And those that don't love us,
May God turn their hearts.
And if He doesn't turn their hearts
May He turn their ankles
So we'll know them by their limping.

May love and laughter light your days
and warm your heart and home.
May good and faithful friends be yours,
wherever you may roam.
May peace and plenty bless your world
with joy that long endures.
May all life's passing seasons,
bring the best to you and yours.



kenju said...

AMEN! the old saying is true.

marciamayo said...

You know, it might be your good fortune to know the limitations of the time you and Ron will have - for we all are limited in our time here on earth. It's just that most of us don't realize it.

Arkansas Patti said...

marcia said it again. Sometimes not knowing our limits encourages us to waste precious time. None of us are guaranteed tomorrow and few of us take advantage.

Patrick said...

What a great entry!

Caregivingly Yours, Patrick