Thursday, April 4, 2013

It takes a village.....

My brother is really working hard on being independent.  He called me yesterday to tell me he wasn't going to call me all day.  We are working on self-control.  He knows that Ron will be having surgery next month so I have him working on impulse control.  It has been his habit to call both Ron and I all day long.  I asked him to practice this month limiting his calls to Ron so that he'll be able to give Ron time to rest after his surgery.  How much of this he actually understands and can remember is anyone's guess.

It makes me feel terrible but I don't want Mike at the hospital.  I don't want my attention to be on him rather than Ron.  If my older brother can bring him up for a quick visit to reassure him that Ron is doing OK that might work but I don't want to have to take care of him.  Mike is such a sweetheart and he loves Ron so much but he gets very emotional when he is scared.

I've been making a list of things to get done before Ron's surgery.  I'm such a planner.... this morning I was watching as Ron gathered the trash and got everything outside for the garbage pickup.  I thought about how I did everything myself for over 40 years and in less than 2 years I've gotten so spoiled.  I no longer mow the yard, empty the dishwasher, take out the trash or make the bed.  What a slug I've become.  I'm going to try my hand at mowing again though.  I can't believe we purchased a new mower last summer and I haven't ever started it or used it.  What a change from my single days.  I once changed my own radiator hose in my car as well as always changed my own oil.  What a difference it makes when you have someone who shares the chores with you.  I feel like a lady of leisure!

Mike has had someone clean his house twice/month for the last year but has decided he can do it himself.  I like his confidence but I'm a little worried he won't be able to manage.  I used to clean the house for him and my mother when she was alive with the help of my daughter.  Of course I was single then and had more time.  So we will see how he does on his own.  I'm going to try and spend some time teaching him the basics and maybe I'll have someone deep clean for him every 3 to 4 months. 


Olga said...

You take on so much. It is wonderful that you have a partner and helpmate in Ron and he is fortunate to have YOU. I keep you in my prayerful thoughts.

Paisely Brook said...

You have an 18 year old living next door, pay him to mow the lawn.