A man and his wife were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while in bed. The man turned to his wife and said,
"Do you want to have sex?"
"No," she answered.
He then said, "Is that your final answer?"
She didn't even look at him this time, simply saying "Yes."
So He said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And then the fight started
After retiring, a man went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked him for his driver's license to verify his age.
He looked in his pockets and realized he had left his wallet at home.
He told the woman that he was very sorry, but he would have to go home and come back later.
The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So he opened his shirt revealing his curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me'
And she processed his Social Security application.
When he got home, he excitedly told his wife about his experience at the Social Security office! She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten Disability, too'
And then the fight started.....
Saturday morning a man got up early, quietly dressed, made his lunch, grabbed
the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage.
He hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour.
The wind was blowing 50 mph, so he pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.
He went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed and cuddled up to his wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered,
The weather out there is terrible.' His loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?'
And that's how the fight started ...
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