Well, life is settling down. Mike has his new med and we will see how it works. I read the drug information on it and thought if the disease doesn't get you the cure surely will. The doctor added Lorazepam to the drug cocktail. He'll take it 3 times a day instead of his prn medication for anxiety. If it makes him too sleepy we cut the noon dose. The literature says not to take it for more than 4 months so I don't know what the plan is for this drug. Mike didn't call me last night (that's a first) so that was good. Ron did talk to him so I know he was OK. Mike now takes 10 meds in the am, 2 at noon, 2 in the evening and 9 at bedtime. Hopefully we will have a calmer week.
My cough and respiratory (pardon me) crap is back. I'll get to the doctor if I ever get a chance. I hated to come to work this morning but I have so much to do I just can't take off.
Mike keeps me so busy I don't have time to worry about Ron. I don't know if that's good or bad. I don't want something to slip up on us and I find myself unprepared. It's so easy to just forget that he has cancer. He's feeling good. I find myself thinking he's beat the odds. It's easy to think that way until you see the oncologist who always has to remind us that "Ron's condition is grave". What does that mean, grave? Is that a really poor play on words? Why does she insist on bursting our bubble? She tells us that everything is stable and we get so excited and then she hits us with, "Now, you have to remember, Ron's condition is grave." She says she doesn't want us to have false hope. Why not? Why not any kind of hope? When you stop having hope you just stop! I believe in miracles....why if I didn't I couldn't do what I do every day. I see miracles every where I look. To me Ron is a walking miracle. Two major surgeries that he sailed through with little pain. That's a miracle. Every day he feels good and is free of pain or discomfort. That's a miracle. So........why not a miracle cure? It could happen!
No News
5 weeks ago
5 comments:
I think she just doesn't want you getting careless with your vigilance. It is easy to do when you feel good.
What a relief for you to get some Mike worry free time. Hope those drugs keep him calm and you rested.
There is nothing wrong with having hope. And I am so glad your brother is giving you a break. You need to spend quality time with your husband and enjoy life together.
I think if anyone deserves a miracle, it is you. Take care of yourself.
Goodness, there is a lot of illness in your life at the moment! I can only hope things improve for you and your family. Best, Mark (taking a sneaky peek at your blog from the UK!)
Post a Comment