Thursday, August 1, 2019

If you can't stand the heat......

Well, where to start.  I am now 70 years old.  A fact that I still haven't quite wrapped my brain around yet.  My daughters hosted a birthday party for their old mom and it was great fun for old and young alike.  The kids swam for hours, the younger crowd shared their dismay to see summer end.  And the rest of us oldies just ate, stayed inside where it was cool and tried to figure out how we got so old so fast!

On Monday Mike had his pacemaker surgery and did great.  He had to stay overnight in the hospital but was loving being the center of attention.  He was discharged Tuesday morning with the restriction he is not to raise his left arm.  They strapped his arm down as a reminder but we didn't feel comfortable leaving him on his own so he is staying with us.  So far everything is going remarkably well.

I'd like to take this opportunity to say once more that I'm married to a saint!  Ron has bathed my brother and helped him dress every day.  A job he took on himself to preserve Mike's dignity.  Also Mike has been so cooperative and pleasant that it's just worked out great.  He has a follow-up with the heart doctor on Monday and we will evaluate the situation then.  He may be with us the entire 4 weeks but it will all work out fine.

Over the past year Ron and I both gained weight.  Today we recommitted to a healthier eating plan.  I want to get the extra weight off so I'll be in a better position to have knee replacement surgery.  I have a consultation August 22.

I drug out my sewing machine today and made new curtains for my daughter's classroom.  She's decorating her class in a farmhouse theme and wanted buffalo check curtains.  I haven't sewn in so long I couldn't even remember how to fill the bobbin.  It's a new machine I had only used once about 4 years ago.  Now I'm anxious to work on some other projects.  Maybe a few Christmas projects.

I have managed to start my Christmas shopping.  I think I've purchased 5 or 6 gifts so far and I know pretty much what I'm getting everyone this year.  Just want to spread the money over the next 3 months.  We still have to have the line replaced in our AC unit.  Estimate was about $900.  Not to mention the hit we took from the damaged carpet.  The AC was patched up and freon added in the hope it would make it until the fall.  However, we are having triple digit heat right now and I've got my fingers crossed the AC will make it. 

Hope everyone is staying cool wherever you are.  Oh, the heat made me think of a new bumper sticker.  "If you voted for Trump, you better get used to the heat".  That's my slam on climate change deniers!

Oh a final note.  I'm still taking the cbd oil and lungs are continuing to improve.  I had my first A1C taken yesterday since starting the oil and I was down from 7.1 to 6.0.  That's a significant drop and I wasn't even eating as well as I should.  I can't wait to see where it is after eating right!

Wednesday, July 17, 2019

just another update

Well, here we go again.  Mike's pacemaker has been approved so we are just waiting to hear when the surgery is scheduled.  We took him to the dermatologist Monday and now he has a suspected skin cancer on his back.  Have to schedule surgery to remove it and get a biopsy.  I'm still waiting to schedule my stomach procedure and colonoscopy.  (Whew)

The carpet has been dried out, pad replaced and carpet reinstalled.  So far to the tune of just over $500.00.  I cleaned it myself and it looks pretty good.  I'm going to wait to have it professionally cleaned because it appears the AC has decided to act up.  Thank goodness it hasn't quit entirely but it isn't handling the 100+ weather we are having.  It won't cool down past 76.  Fortunately our HVAC guy is coming out today and praying it just needs freon.  We've been taking the hits lately and we need a break!

We started moving the furniture back into our bedroom yesterday and hopefully we will finish it today.  Slowly getting things back to normal.

I've been reading a few commentators on just what this presidency has done to the country and what the long term ramifications are projected to be and it isn't pretty.  So many destructive behaviors have now become legitimized such as lying, bigotry, xenophobia to name a few.  We have accepted this behavior from the most powerful position in the world. This is what has bothered me the most.  Once people don't care about truth, honesty, decency in general, where do you go from there? 

Sunday, July 7, 2019

I need order!

So much going on I can't keep up!  Mike was scheduled to have the pacemaker put in tomorrow but it was canceled by the doctor on Tuesday but we didn't know about it until Friday.  Confused?  Just a tad!

Our bedroom carpet was ruined by a backed up drain.  We are still in limbo about that.  Have to move all the furniture out of our bedroom and store it while the flooring is tended to.  We've had fans on the carpet but it is still damp because of the padding underneath.  

I'm one of those people who has to have order to function.  Sounds funny coming from me since for the most part my whole life is chaos.  But I must have order in my surroundings to compensate for all the other things in my life of which I have no control.  (Now that makes a little more sense I think)  

So this upheaval of furniture and flooring is a REALLY big deal for me.  I have to have a place for everything so that I don't start feeling overwhelmed.  Unfortunately we do not have a garage or this would be much less disrupting.  I think I'm going to look into renting one of those storage pods they drop on your driveway.  We can put everything in it and leave my house intact so I don't lose my flipping mind.  I know everyone around me would be happy!  All of this has put me in a purging mood again.  I'm ready to get rid of excess furniture and anything else I haven't used in the past two years.  I go through these spells every time I feel like my life is out of control.  (Which occurs quite regularly) 
At these times I organize everything I can get my hands on.  It just makes me feel peaceful.  Anyone else a little compulsive or what strategies do you use for coping?

I saw the infectious disease doctor Tuesday.  He didn't see anything he thought required treating.  I told him I'm actually getting better but I didn't tell him I'm taking cbd oil.  I'm playing "Don't ask, don't tell."  I don't know why I'm hesitant to say anything I guess I'm afraid they won't like my "self treating" but hey, I was desperate.

Saturday, June 29, 2019

Keeping Pace

Don't know where the time has gone but again life just gets in the way at times.

Mike had to wear a heart monitor for a couple of days and the result was that his heart rate drops significantly during the night and daytime hours.  During the day it drops as low as 28.  Hence he is scheduled for a pacemaker July 8th.  He knows about it but not the date as of yet.  We will keep that information from him until the 7th.  Less time for him to become anxious.  He's anxious enough just knowing about it.  He imagines all kind of restrictions which are few.  He can only raise his arms less than 90 degrees for a couple of weeks. That's it!  But he thinks he can't shower among other imaginary restrictions.  But hey, that's the way the ball rolls for now.  The cardiologist said that otherwise he is in excellent health and could easily live another 20 years with a pacemaker.

Now you'd think my reaction to that news would be one of elation.  But like so many caregivers the fear is always that a caregiver will not outlive their dependent.  I hate to admit but a part of me thought why do this?  Let him slip away one night in his sleep.  But of course that was a fleeting thought brought about from constant worry about what his future looks like.  So we will proceed!

Right after we saw the cardiologist Mike said, "I can just come live with you and Ron."  I said "no".  So hard to say that but I know it would never work out.  My lifespan would be cut in half.  He then said, "That's ok, Ron will just move in with me and take care of me."  Again, I said "no".  Then he asked if I resent him.  I said, "Sometimes...I resent your illness.  But I love you." 

These conversations are so hard.  I want to be honest with him while protecting him at the same time.  Not always easy.  The uncertainty of our healthcare system and lack of help for the aging, mental health and healthcare in general makes the future just unpredictable.  I really am living my life one day at a time.  I can't plan any further that the next minute.

Friday, June 14, 2019


I saw my oncologist yesterday and got the results of my recent CAT scan.  Everything looked great.  Great improvement.  In fact so great I don't have to see her anymore since my lung doctor is following up with regular scans.  I was very pleased.  And the only change I have made in treatment is the cannabis oil.  My lungs are so much clearer now it's amazing.  My energy is increasing every day.  I couldn't be happier.

Tuesday I get to pick up little miss at daycare and we are going to the museum to look at dinosaur  bones.  I think I'll take her for a hamburger afterwards.  I can't wait.  I enjoy the little stinker so much!

Ron is seeing a new neurologist this morning.  He just hasn't been happy with his current medication and wants to see if this doctor will have any new suggestions.  

Today is my brother Mike's 71st birthday.  We took him out last night for a birthday dinner.  He's doing good.  One day at a time is what I tell him every day.  But all in all he's doing well.

We actually had more rain last night.  I don't think we will dry out in Oklahoma until August.  We can just sit outside and watch the grass grow.  Of course I know by the end of the summer we will be praying for rain so I'd better not complain.

Tuesday, June 11, 2019

More pokes and prodding

Last week we were dog sitting Ellie's sister Winnie.  It went pretty well but was a challenge with all the rain we've been having.  My floors were horrible.  Finally got everything clean yesterday.  

Today I had another CT scan with contrast.  Fortunately the IV was started on the first stick and no one had to go get an ultrasound machine to find a vein.  I think all the water I've been drinking helped a lot....plumped up those veins. I see the oncologist on Thursday to get the results. 

I still haven't gotten the results of the stomach biopsy but I'm sure if it had been bad someone would have called by now.  I'm giving the office a call tomorrow though.

I must say that all this rain sure has made the flowers grow.  Our backyard is really in bloom. 

I had my favorite visitor over Saturday for a play date.  She looked like she had grown a foot in just the past two weeks.  She had us hopping for five hours playing catch in the backyard and blowing bubbles.  She is one busy bee.  I was glad I was feeling pretty good although Ron had to help keep her entertained because I couldn't keep up.  Friday night we are taking her to see The Life of Pets II.  I think I'm more excited to see it than Piper.  I thought the first movie was darling.

For some reason I didn't sleep hardly at all last night.  Maybe 3 hours total so I'm just exhausted tonight.  I'm heading to bed.

Thursday, June 6, 2019

CBD oil - is it the new magix elixcor?

I've been taking CBD oil now for about 6 weeks.  I was put on a low and slow dosage plan.  I've settled now at 13 drops (under the tongue) twice a day.  I can't say I have experienced any miraculous cure of anything but I can say that I'm beginning to notice a decrease of some symptoms.

1.  Mucus production is lower.  It is easier to clear my lungs now than before I started.

2.  Energy level is beginning to improve.  Yesterday was one of the better days that I've had in quite a while.

3.  I have a knee that is in need of a joint replacement.  I'm walking better now after starting the oil.

One of the conditions that there has been reported improvement is anxiety.   Since I don't really suffer from anxiety I can't weigh in on whether it helps.

I had just reached a place where I felt I had nothing to lose in trying it.  I did some research before I decided on which one to try.  I'm taking HempWorx because it is only one of a few that are actually inspected for purity.  There are currently no government regulations on cbd oil and every Tom, Dick and Harry is setting up shop to sell it.  I get it from a physician's assistant who became interested after taking it herself.  She had a lung condition that had reduced her lung capacity by 75%.  After 9 months she had improved it to 90%.  

So I figured why not try it.  I have been in constant contact with the PA during the whole process and she has guided me as to when to increase the dosage and when to back down.  You are required to drink half your body weight in ounces of water per day.  This has been good for me in general because I've never been too good about getting enough water. 

I'll let you know what I experience as I go along.