A Better Day

    Mike had a much better day yesterday!  Just when I think I have lost my ability to cope and I'm at my wits end God steps in.  I got just the break I needed and am ready to start over.  In fact I'm the one who called Mike last night because I HADN'T heard from him since 2pm.  He was fine, just tired from his busy day.  He volunteered at the church thrift store yesterday, something he really enjoys and he was tired. 
    Ron and I have a lot going on this weekend.  We are going to a memorial service for an old high school classmate on Saturday.  I hate the fact that we are now at that age when we are losing many of our friends but I guess this is where we are in life.
    I've been watching documentaries on 9/11 and we saw one last night on flight 175 that flew into the World Trade Center.  They interviewed family members who spoke with their loved ones during the highjacking.  One set of parents were watching the plane on tv while talking to their son on th phone just as the plane went into the tower. I was ahhh struck by the calmness in his voice.  It made me think that I would have felt lucky to have been able to speak one last time to my loved one.  I hope it gave those family members some sense of peace.  I can't imagine induring such pain.
   Ron and I will be attending a meeting Sunday night with several different religious leaders of varying faiths in our community.  It is an opportunity to discuss ways to strengthen our communities.  I'm looking forward to hearing what they have to say.
  

Three Blind Mice

Some days my brother really tests my last nerve.  I'm not proud of that fact but it just comes with the territory.  He has developed a fixation on his eyes.  He was seen by the Ophthalmologist  who diagnosed him with allergies.  No big surprise since he is allergic to everything in nature.  His eyes get matted and they will water, itch and burn.  He has some prescription eye drops and he uses artificial tears when needed.  But..........he is so fixated on it that he thinks he is totally debilitated because of his eyes.  

He called me at least 30 times yesterday which was a clue that he was obsessing about something.  At 2pm he called and asked me to come over at 5:00 if he wasn't any better.  I asked him what was wrong and he replied, "I'm blind."

"What do you mean your blind?" I asked.

"My eyes shut down....I'm blind...I've been blind all day." responded Mike.

Hmmmmmmm the other 29 calls there was no mention of being BLIND.


This has become an every day topic.  He is driving me nuts with this.  He wanted the neighbor to come over and help him.  I asked him what he needed help with and he said, "To go to the bathroom."


I got frustrated and told him I was sure he could find the bathroom with his eyes closed and I know he knows where his (pardon the expression) pecker is so leave the poor neighbor alone.


He wears goggles in the shower and now he's blind.  Of course he was no longer blind at 4:00.  The neighbor came over and put drops in Mike's eyes and low and behold........the blind can see!!!  Pardon my sarcasm - it's just a tension release.

God.........give me patience....but hurry!

I Hope Love Does Win

My brain has been really quiet lately, not much going on in my head. My dad used to tell all of his children that they had shiny little brains without a wrinkle in them. Lately, my little wrinkle-less brain has been totally empty. I hate to write something down that even bores the snot out of me so I’ve been waiting for a bolt of inspiration. Unfortunately nothing of any magnitude has come along.

Our Sunday school class has been reading Love Wins, by Rob Bell. We did have quite the discussion last Sunday led by a well-educated philosopher who spoke way over my head for most of the class. There were also lively interjections by a Cornell University science graduate who merely rebuffed any inquiry into matters that could not be measured scientifically.

Here are some excerpts from Love Wins: A Book About Heaven, Hell, and the Fate of Every Person Who Has Ever Lived
“A staggering number of people have been taught that a few select Christians will spend forever in a peaceful, joyous place called heaven, while the rest of humanity spends forever in torment and punishment in hell with no chance for anything better. It's been clearly communicated to many that this belief is a central truth of the Christian faith and to reject it is, in essence, to reject Jesus. This is misguided and toxic and ultimately subverts the contagious spread of Jesus message of love, peace, forgiveness, and joy that our world desperately needs to hear."

"At the center of the Christian tradition since the first church has been the insistence that history is not tragic, hell is not forever, and love, in the end, wins."

"When people say they're tired of hearing about "sin" and "judgment: and "condemnation," it's often because those have been confused for them with the nature of God. God has no desire to inflict pain or agony on anyone."

"For some, the highest form of allegiance to their God is to attack, defame, and slander others who don't articulate matters of faith as they do."

"None of us have cornered the market on Jesus, and none of us ever will."

In an exclusive interview with USA TODAY, Bell jokes: "I am not aware that labels are the highest form of goodness and truth." He rebuffs critics who say he presents a Jesus-optional Christianity: "Jesus spoke of the renewal of all things. He said, 'I have sheep who are not of this flock.' Through him, extraordinary things are happening in the world. If saying that gets you banned from the E-club, so be it."

Bell's view is "that God is love, that he sent Jesus to show us that love, that love demands freedom. So making definitive judgments about other people's destiny is not interesting to me. The heart of God is to rescue everyone from everything we need to be rescued from."

I can’t help but think about what my maternal grandmother’s reaction to this book might be. She was of a fundamentalist faith that did not encourage freethinking. In other words they did not care if “Inquiring minds wanted to know”.


One thing that was brought up in class was the idea that before we begin our earthly lives as humans we have all the knowledge we need. We know everything there is to know about God. It is an innate knowledge given to us all by God. But, once we enter into our earthly bodies and lives we may begin to lose that knowledge.



Well, the way I interrupted this is that we may have that innate knowledge but sometimes we just “educate” it right out of ourselves. (Like my two friends in class)  My thoughts are that we all or at least most of us have a voice inside us that we either choose to listen to or to ignore. That voice can be called a conscience or whatever else you might name it. If we listen to it we know when we are treating someone in a way that we would not like to be treated. We have to be conscious of our intention. Now what we humans are very good at is justifying our actions. Frankly I believe religion over complicates the whole thing.


"Satan is the best friend the church has ever had as he has kept it in business all these years." -Anton LaVey


“I’d rather believe and be wrong than not believe and be wrong.” –Pascal


I haven’t finished the book yet but there are some points that resonate with me. I agree with the author that the idea that geography may dictate whether you go to heaven or not never quite made sense to me. What would be God’s purpose for that?

Gotta Stay Healthy

I know it doesn't sound possible but this is the first time that it has ever hit me that I can't afford to be sick.  I haven't felt good since last Friday and after a week it finally hit me that I CAN'T get sick.  I am the caregiver and caregivers just don't have time to get sick.  What really got me was thinking about what would happen to my brother if I were not here to look after him?  I can't believe I've never thought about that before.  I just assume I'll always be here to take care of him.  How naive is that?  I know it is silly to worry about things that haven't happened but it really did shake me up to think I can't afford to get sick.  Thank goodness there is nothing seriously wrong with me but it did give me cause to think about the situation.  I'm sure this is a concern for all caregivers.

Techno Savy

What is it about blogging that is so addictive?  What makes a person (me) want to put their whole life out into the universe for all the world to see?  I don't know the answer to that but I know I can't resist it.  When I started this it was with the intention of making it a private journal but I wasn't smart enough to figure out how to do that.  All it took was receiving that first "comment" and I couldn't have cared less who read my thoughts.  Since then I have met wonderful people who have offered me encouragement when I needed it and shared the wisdom of their own experiences.  I have shared with them some of the most trying times of my life and some of the happiest. Through their blogs I have laughed and been enlightened.  I've learned everything from animal rescue to the art of floral arranging.  I have marveled at their ability to write with humor and have traveled to places I might never have seen otherwise.

I am now addicted to being able to see who has stumbled upon my rants and am always amazed as to just how we are all connected by the click of a key.  People from all over the world.  Most are like me and merely take a glimpse and move on without leaving a comment.  But that's OK...though I love to read the comments left behind by strangers, just knowing they peaked in is good enough.

I am not computer savy or even technologically enlightened but I do know a good thing when I see it.    THIS is a good thing!

Not much going on here!

Wish I could say I am feeling better but my doctor put me on a Sulfa drug and it's making me sick at my stomach.  I only have to take it 3 days and this is day 2 so maybe I'll make it.  Three doses down and 3 to go.  Unfortunately tonight is my monthly board meeting so it will unfortunately be a long day.  Hope everyone's day is wonderful!

Counting Your Blessings

The weekend was so so.  I was sick all weekend and didn't get out of bed all day Saturday.  Ron took over and spent Saturday with Mike just so I could get some rest.  They went to an OU alumni basketball game which Mike thoroughly enjoyed.  He even lasted through the whole game.  Ron took him to eat and it was just a big day for Mike.

Sunday Ron took Mike to church.  As they were seated in the sanctuary Mike asked Ron when the first OU football game was going to happen.  Ron told him and Mike asked if he could stand up and yell Boomer Sooner.    Thank goodness he asked first!  Ron told him church might not be the proper venue.  

Last night Mike called me and said his neighbor Tom asked if he could mow Mike's yard for him for free.  His kindness made Mike cry and his neighbor said, "You can pay me by sharing your blessings with me."  So, Mike called me to get help writing down his blessings.  We talked about what he considers his blessings which were University of Oklahoma football, his Silver Slippers aerobics class, his neighbor Tom, his church and his brother and sister.  Then Mike told me he told Tom he would give him his blessings in three's.    I just love the way he thinks..................