Friday, January 24, 2014

The Bermuda Triangle

This has been a most interesting week for me.  Because I am going to be out on leave from the hospital and because I'm sure administratively they are considering the possibility I may choose to retire next year, a decision was made to double fill my position.  This is a little tricky because I'll still be here and so will my replacement.  I hope I handle this graciously but it will take all the patience and diplomacy I can muster.  I'm not even sure I can express exactly what my reservations are about all this.  This is about shedding oneself of ego.........that pesky thing that gets us in so much trouble.  It is so hard to stay balanced when your ego is screaming in your ear!

The other issue I have is I believe a person must have the opportunity to make a position their own.  He/she isn't going to do everything the same way I do it.  That's not only good but have to make it your own.  I'm just afraid that will be hard for whomever they hire because the "old gal" ain't dead yet.  Well they feel free to do it their way?  I don't want anyone to feel inhibited.  That will make for an uncomfortable environment for both of us.

The last thing that is hard is strictly personal.  I'm seeing my working life come to a close.  It has been a very defining part of my existence for 45 years and it is ending.  All the dreams and ambitions associated with work are ending and new dreams have to take over.  I'm just caught in the abyss right now....somewhere in between dreams.


1 comment:

kenju said...

When I gave up my business, I felt like I was in limbo for a while, but I soon learned my place and came to enjoy retirement. Of course, I still do work occasionally, and it is nice to keep my hands in it. Good luck.