Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Wouldn't it be nice if we were older..........Beach Boys

Nothing takes you back in time faster than a musical trilogy from your past.  I can hear a song from the sixties and I'm right there, going to my first high school dance or cruising Main street with a carload of girlfriends.  How do I forget where I put my keys last night but I remember every word to every song the Beatle's sang?   Sometimes the music is so nostalgic I choke back tears but for the most part it just makes me feel like I'm still that young girl.  Waiting to see what my future will bring.

I remember singing along to the radio when I was in high school at the top of my lungs.  "I'm the pied piper......follow me" only I was singing "Armed with my bible....follow me".  Didn't find out what the words really were until my girlfriends heard me singing and burst into hysterical laughter.

Ron's doctor's appointment is at 2:30 this afternoon..........keep those good vibes coming.  I've got my fingers crossed we get good news!  Ron asked me not to go with him today and I didn't let it hurt my feelings.  I think he needs to feel free to talk to his oncologist without me present.  I know he is considering not having surgery no matter what they say.  I don't agree with that decision but I guess I need to let the doctor try to persuade him.  Maybe he will do better without me there but it is hard.

Later:  It is 2:50 and I'm sure Ron is at the doctor's office.  I'm sick at my stomach.  I was so torn between wanting to give Ron space and wanting to be with him.  I'm so scared of hearing the results of his scan.  I've been praying that the spots in his lungs would be gone or not any larger.  I'm terrified of the cancer coming back in the original site as well.  I am just scared!  Is this the day our lives change forever or is it 3 more months of normal?  I always feel like we are standing at the edge of a cliff.

3:35:  Just talked to my husband.....we can take one step back from the cliff's edge.  There was no change and the spot in his lung had not grown.  No surgery for now.  Wait 3 more months and scan again.  Ron sounded very relieved (of course) and I can exhale now.  This is such an emotional roller coaster and one that I know many people are riding.  My thoughts and prayers are with all the people who are fighting cancer or know or have loved ones fighting this horrible disease.


Muffy's Marks said...

Weren't the 60's the best? Prayers coming your way, hope all goes well at the doctor's visit.

Olga said...

My sister and her husband are going through a very similar experience with the 3-month or 6- month revisits. It is enough to make me hope that Mike and I get run over by a runaway bus.

oklhdan said...

Olga, I know what you mean. The emotional roller coaster really takes it out of a person.