So....there I was, 27 years old, with no college education (I quit school to help my husband finish and he left 1 week before receiving his graduate degree) I had 5 year old twin daughters and no job. Now that was a pickle! At first I grieved, then I got angry, then I sucked up what little self-esteem I had left and enrolled in school. I took an exec. secretarial course because I needed to brush up my skills and I needed to get a job as quickly as possible. About 5 months into the course the school hired me to be their deaf education secretary. I worked there for 6 years and then decided to go back to college.
We had very little money and I often worked 2 jobs but we made it. As in most everything in life, timing is key. The girls were old enough by then to be a huge help. They were great tutors and learned astronomy right along with me. They flourished with the added responsibility and it was during this time that they learned to cook and sew. They basically ran our household and I am still proud just remembering how they stepped up to help me while I pursued school.
Dating was just about out of the question though. Who in the world had time? Between work, school and spending time with the girls there just were not enough hours in the day. I decided early on that I would just put my personal life on hold until after my girls were grown and on their own. It isn't the right decision for every single mom but it was the right one for me. I don't think I could have combined motherhood and a new husband let alone a blended family. (I greatly admire those who manage to do just that) Sometimes I felt guilty that my children didn't have a father (he was never involved in their lives after he left) and I sometimes wondered if we were a real family. But now I know that kids can make it just fine as long as they have at least one stable, dependable parent. They just need to feel secure and even a single parent can provide that security. What was the most difficult time in my life turned out to be the greatest opportunity for personal growth. I found out just exactly who I am and what I'm capable of doing. I will never be afraid of losing myself again.
Then the timing was right to fall in love again. It was unexpected but oh so welcomed. I am married to my best friend and now that I'm about to be 62 years old, I can say I have it ALL and I wouldn't change a thing.