Monday, May 6, 2013

As the brain churns

As my brother's cognitive abilities decline it becomes increasingly evident that Ron and I will have to step in more and more.  For the most part Mike has been handling his own finances with Ron and I checking in and making sure he has enough money.  But lately we are noticing he is more and more confused about how much he has and how much he is spending.  (The extra foot long sandwich each day for the refrigerator for example).One idea we are considering is to have all his bills sent to us and then we will pay them from his account.  

He likes to use a credit card for all his food purchases but we are thinking about putting a cap on the limit.  We've tried to avoid getting legal guardianship of Mike because of all the red tape you have to jump through.  We had legal guardianship of my mother and the majority of her estate went to pay the lawyer.  We want to avoid that if possible.  As long as we have power of attorney and Mike is cooperative I think we can manage without that formality. 

We want him to remain as independent as possible but at the same time we want to protect him from people who would take advantage of his disability.  Sadly there are many.  One of his neighbors was able to get nearly $7,000 from him to paint the house inside and out.  (This was before our mother died) The money is gone but the house was never painted.  Ended up the guy was a drug addict that took the money and split.  

Mike is so impulsive that he does things first and then asks if it was alright after the fact.    I guess I have no choice but to get even more involved than I have been.  I guess I'm just feeling overwhelmed.  I wish I could just enjoy him and not be responsible for him....if that makes sense.
 

1 comment:

Olga said...

I hate that there are those unscrupulous people out there. I was so grateful that my brother took control of my mother's finances. I was not so grateful to the parish priest who brought her a box of envelopes for Sunday donations, saying "I know it gives you joy to contribute to the church." She was stuffing each envelope with $20 bills and going to church every day. To me, that was a pretty shameful thing for the priest to do. really seemed like taking advantage.