Friday, June 25, 2010

Ever have one of those days when you just woke up feeling like pure ole blahhhhhh....well that's me today!  I got a haircut yesterday - don't like it - can't say why because it probably looks just like it did 2 minutes before I got it cut - which just says I wasn't happy in the first place.  All that just sounds like a good case of whining!  If I put my mind to it I can change my mood around before lunch time. 

I loved this little story about how one mother made her son feel guilty when he called her on the phone:
"Hi Ma, How are you?"
"Not so good.  I haven't eaten for 27 days, so I'm very weak."
"Good heavens, that's terrible.  Why not?"
"I didn't want to have my mouth full of food if you should happen to call me."

Here are some NEW Barbie dolls to coincide with her and OUR aging gracefully.

Bifocals Barbie.  Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild colors (half-frames too!)  neck chain and large-print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart Living.

Hot Flash Barbie.  Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead.  Comes with hand-held fan and tiny tissues.

Facial Hair Barbie.  As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whisters grow.  Available with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror.

Flabby Arms Barbie.  Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with these new, roomier-sleeved gowns.  Good news on the tummy front, too - muumuus with tummy-support panels are included.

Bunion Barbie.  Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feed.  Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and plasters, then slip on soft terry mules.

Post-Menopausal Barbie.  This Barbie wets her pants when she sneezes, forgets where she puts things, and cries a lot.  She is sick and tired of Ken sitting on the couch watching the tube, clicking through the channels.  Comes with Depends and Kleenex.  As a bonus this year, the book "Getting In Touch with Your Inner Self" is included.

The good news about mid-life is that the glass is still half-full.  Of course, the bad news is that it won't be long before your teeth are floating in it.

3 comments:

marciamayo said...

Dani, sorry you're feeling blah but you made me laugh, so thanks.
As I say, the problem isn't the hair but the face that goes under it. I'll find a hairstyle I love on someone else (usually a model)but, on me,....well, you get the picture.

kenju said...

We both get our hair cut on Monday and anything will be an improvement!! My hairdresser said he thought I'd opt for a shorter cut when the weather got hot - and I'm considering it!

Arkansas Patti said...

Loved the Barbies. Could so relate.
I hate when I cut my hair when I was perfectly satisfied with it the way it was.
That is my sad tale.